Where I’ve Been ~ Where I Am ~ Where I’m Headed

Dog Days Are Over
Florence and the Machine

Happiness hit her like a train on a track
Coming towards her stuck still no turning back
She hid around corners and she hid under beds
She killed it with kisses and from it she fled
With every bubble she sank with her drink
And washed it away down the kitchen sink

The dog days are over
The dog days are done
The horses are coming
So you better run

Run fast for your mother, run fast for your father
Run for your children, for your sisters and brothers
Leave all your love and your longing behind
You can’t carry it with you if you want to survive

The dog days are over
The dog days are done
Can you hear the horses?
Because here they come

And I never wanted anything from you
Except everything you had and what was left after that too, oh
Happiness hit her like a bullet in the head
Struck from a great height by someone who should know better than that

The dog days are over
The dog days are done
Can you hear the horses?
Because here they come

Run fast for your mother, run fast for your father
Run for your children, for your sisters and brothers
Leave all your loving, your loving behind
You can’t carry it with you if you want to survive

The dog days are over
The dog days are done
Can you hear the horses?
Because here they come

The dog days are over
The dog days are done
The horses are coming
So you better run

Learn Something New Every Day

September has been a month of learning and being reminded of things I already knew but may have forgotten. Some things I didn’t want to learn but I knew I needed to pay attention. Sometimes we only have one chance to learn and we better listen good.

Before the month had barely started I learned that the death angel doesn’t really care who you are.

On September 4th I learned that little children should not have to spend a Saturday attending their father’s funeral.

The days following, I learned that the show must and will go on. One step in front of the other.

Yesterday, I learned that I’m stronger than I thought I was.

But today I learned that sometimes I’m not as strong as I need to be.

Each and every day I’m learning to love a little better.

And just when I thought I had learned to let go, I find myself holding on a little tighter.

A Giving Challenge

I have accepted a challenge ~

30-Day Giving Challenge

It starts in November. But I may be starting a little early. And here’s the reason why.

Two or three days before Frank, my boss and friend, was killed, I had a couple of dreams about him. In one of these dreams he was telling me to “get rid of 100 things”. I argued with him and said I didn’t think I could do it, maybe I could get rid of 10. But he just kept shaking his head and insisting on 100. I don’t know if he was talking about 100 physical objects or 100 things on a more mental, internal, spiritual level. I’m going to believe it was both. I know of one thing right now that I’m letting go of that will allow me to move on to the next chapter in my life. I feel lighter and more free already.

So…only 99 more things to go.

The Finer Things In Life Giving Challenge

Empty Space…In Memory

I haven’t written anything since Lord knows when. Oh I’ve had lots to say, but for some reason have done a lot of word swallowing, keeping the words in, feeling that, once again, what I had to say didn’t hold too much importance in the scheme of things.

Of course that can only last for so long.

Words have a way of rising up in your throat and yes they will choke you if you don’t let them out.

My life is still passing me by. Day by incredible day. I feel the need to capture each moment but each moment is gone before I can wrap my fingers around it. I must be lazy me thinks or by now I’d be so much better at capturing.

One thing that really wakes me to the incredibly fast passage of life is that moment when I’m coasting merrily along and something happens to knock the wind right out of my sails. Something so big that I start pondering that question again…you know the one…

Is this all there is?

It’s true that “THIS” is wonderful and I wouldn’t trade it for the world. But there’s so much more. I see it in the lives of others.

The lives of others as I look through rose colored glasses…

And so I fall in love so easily. Not the romantic type of love. But the adoring, swooning, you’re such a great big person and your presence fills the room and I want to be just like you when I grow up kind of love. It fills my days with wonder and makes life so interesting.

And then when those that hold such grandness exit my life, they leave a great big gaping hole that cannot be filled…ever. For a moment in time I am left gasping for breath and wondering what in the hell just happened.

Frank Montgomery, III was just such a person in my life. My boss, my friend, larger than life he was. He boomed out my name and I’d come running like a little puppy.

He was killed last Wednesday night. Taken from us in a moment. Amidst the crunch of metal and cold unrelenting asphalt. Just gone.

We were told last Thursday morning in the conference room, while we were all squished together like sardines in a can. Not really enough air to go around but thankfully everyone was breathing rather shallow because we all sensed that something was just “not right”. We had no idea how “not right” things actually were.

It is SO sad when people leave us. Yes, life goes on and we stumble through the fog and the haze and come out on the other side with a greater understanding of the preciousness and frailty of life.

But the space left behind is just so empty.

He’s been gone a week. I miss his presence. We all do.

Frank E. Montgomery, III
1969 – 2010

We miss you Frank ~ you will live forever in our hearts.

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